Saturday, August 7, 2010

the whirlwind...

Greetings friends...

You see, there is a double digit number of times in the past few months I have said to Anna, "Heck yeah I'll update our Team Rendell blog. No problem." Well, ambition, meet procrastination.  Clearly, I excel more in the latter.  I'll tell you more someday later...

Anyway, life for Team Rendell in these past few months has met every mental picture you may be having reading the title of this blog.  Other descriptors may include hurricane, F5 tornadic activity, pandilerium, etc.

The last you hear from this lifeblog of ours, it was April, we were at camp in our little house, working hard preparing for the summer ahead.  Things. have. changed.  Buckle up.

Around that time in our hearts we had begun to ask ourselves, as it is good to do, as a year on the prairie in ND was approaching, how we felt about where we were in things like life, job, family, etc.  This exploration brought us a few places. One, we were happy, Anna, Nysse, and I, being together as a family.  We could look at each other and laugh and smile and cry/whimper and know it was all going to be ok.  Two, we had some deep desires....

We had begun to believe that, while we loved so many things about life at camp, there were other things that we wanted as well.  The heart of that was the need to lay down roots.  We had felt like we had been in transition for much of our life and it was time to plant for a while at least.  As we prayed, we realized where we were was not the place to lay down those roots. We began to realize God may be leading us somewhere else.  This lingered in our head and hearts as we still dove completely in to preparing for the summer at camp, staff arrival, campers and parents, games and music, and learing about Jesus.  What a ride it was in May as training began with summer staff joining the year-rounders.  They were and are so talented; such a dynamic, wonderful group of people.

So, its mid-May.  Anna and my mom headed down the the Twin Cities MN to go to a James Taylor and Carol King concert.  They had an incredibly good time.  Anna was in a wedding that weekend so I came down Thursday evening.  On Friday morning, before the weekend festivities began, Anna gives me a box.  It was the prettiest pink box I ever did see.  Inside the box a stick that said one word, THE word, the word we had been waiting for for at least a year and a half....Pregnant.  I remember two things, screaming and tackling.  We have never felt such joy.  We had wanted to have a baby for so long.  Anna's whole life goal had switched from anything she ever thought.  She would love to be a stay-at-home mom. I couldn't wait to be a dad.  Our excitement was simply not containable.  So, we told our families and tried to keep a lid on it from the rest of the world for a while.

At the wedding that weekend, Anna introduced me to a new friend of hers.  This girl was the roommate of the sister of the friend that was getting married.  Follow that?  During that bachelorette party they had begun talking about this faith based financial services organization headquartered in the Twin Cities where this girl worked.  Anna mentioned that I had been thinking about that company as a place I would really like to work if God was bringing us back near the Minneapolis area, closer to family and friends. At the reception while everyone was hitting the dancefloor, I am sitting there talking with this girl about potential opportunities at a Fortune 500 financial company...nerd.  By the following Friday she had given her boss my name, I had sent in an application.  By the next Friday was on the phone for my first interview.  The next Wednesday I headed to an office for a teleconferencing second interview.  The following Monday I was offered the job, a new pilot program with a goal to help 1 million people worry less about money every day.  Cool huh.  We decided to take it.  The kicker, the job started July 19th , 3 weeks from the offer and smack in the middle of a summer camp program.

God leads and we follow.  It should be as simple as that.

It was hard to hold in the news of the pregnancy and after an 8 week checkup the doctor had proclaimed, "Oh yeah, you are definately 8 weeks pregnant." So we told the world via mouth, phone, and of course, facebook.  And twitter.  Information flows so quickly its incredibly, this matters later.  So we had two sets of news to share.  One that we were going to have a baby.  Then a week later, that we were leaving camp and moving to MN for this great new job and to be closer to our fam and friends.  Tears...

Over the 4th we stayed at camp and had our last major duty, hosting a family reunion.  We spent time with them as well as the process of preparing job things for the next person.  We also slowly began to pack a box or two.  Anna's mom came up to be with us over the 4th and good thing she did for a number of reasons.  We didn't have to miss fireworks, good thing to because I am pretty sure there would have been a two woman riot if we did.  These ladies LOVE fireworks.  It was also nice to have a mom there when we went to the doctor that week to check on some light bleeding Anna had been having for a few days.

So, Tuesday we head in to the clinic.  We were excited because they said they would probably do an ultrasound and we were only a few days away from a 12 week appointment to hear the baby's heartbeat.  Wahoo for early milestones.  Well, the ultrasound was, we'll say, wierd, and inconclusive.  Not a great thing when you are talking about babies and mommies.  Next, blood test.  And questions galore about due date and last cycles and timelines.  After reviewing all of this the doctor comes in and the tone of voice, the facial expressions, and while she used many more words it meant one thing...miscarraige.  We have never felt so much devistation.

Let me interject, it continues to become clear to me that my wife and the strongest, bravest woman ever.

They said there was a small chance she was less far along than we originally thought but for the most part we knew, and we cried our eyes out.  Poor girl had to go get more blood tests done the next Thursday and then had to wait again for a day to hear the official news that the pregnancy hormone numbers had dropped.  We had no idea what was coming.

That night Anna began to bleed a little.  Then she woke up at 5:30 am in a small pool of blood.  Sorry for any quesy but it simply did not stop.  We rushed to the hospital in the small town near camp but headed the hour and a half to the big town where Anna was examined and taken in for D&C surgery late that morning.  For her, she descibed the whole thing as the ultimate slap in the face.  "Not only are you not pregnant but bleeding and having to go through the ordeal of fixing it."  It was hard to see God.

Anna had to lay low for the next days.  Camp pretty much just let her be done with her duties and she left a few days before I did with my mom and then her dad to get her down to the Twin Cities.  I finished, with tons of help from great people at camp, packing up the house and then u-haul to move down.  All of this happened inside of 7 days.  We decided it was a blessings to be moving down to where family both immediate and church could be rock-solid support and it was.

Did you know that 1 in 5 pregnancies are miscarried.  Blew my mind.

You know who was incredible support?  Our internet family.  Astounding how many people could speak words of both sympathy and empathy and lift us up.  We owe online social networking something fierce. Thanks again if some of you are reading this.  Your were a Lifeline, capitalized purposely.

Our surroundings now are a loft in mom-in-laws townhome, mom-in-law, sister-in-law, and two golden retreivers.  We are thankful to have a roof over our heads and food to eat.  Truthfully, we can't wait for those roots to have a house (we are hoping to buy as soon as possible) to plant themselves in.  I have started my job and it is simply incredible.  Anna found a great job too.  Get this, it has regular hours, the unwaivering stipulation in her job hunt and something she hasn't experienced in a long while.

Anna has also been rockin her personal blog "Girl with Blog" more and more in this past year especially and it is taking her places.  She is a really, really talented writer.  This weekend it has taken her to New York City for BlogHer '10.  It is really the largest blogging conference there is with over 2400 women in attendance.  She's attending parties, meeting tons of people, going to sessions, and making new friends.  Of course, all this in a cute pair of shoes.  She was also on a TV this past week for a makeup spot.  How cool!

So, do you see why those descriptors make sense.  I even feel like I forgot stuff. The moral of the story is.  God is still good, people are great too, no matter what.

Sorry if there are typos; Anna is the proofread queen.

With love for the world and the people around us...

Team Rendell

1 comment:

  1. Hi Jared; I am one of those new friends Anna met over the weekend at BlogHer. Just wanted to say that you, too, are a talented writer. I knew pieces of your story from hanging out with Anna all weekend...but you filled in the rest beautifully.

    A friend of mine ends each of his blog posts with "Ndimonbethe." It means: as you go, I wear you. It speaks to the hand prints we leave on each other's lives, however large or small, as we move through life. You wife leaves a strong hand print and I can also see why she loves you.

    Also, I believe that sometimes the whirlwinds are thrown our way to remind us how strong we really are. I have no doubt the two of you will be settled in and growing those roots in no time.

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